The Effects of Trauma on Relationships and Mental Health

Life hurts. The reality of living east of Eden is that life hurts, and it can hurt in many ways, with different results. Trauma is the emotional response a person has to an experience that overwhelms their ability to cope. The effects of trauma can linger for days, months, or even years, disrupting the individual’s ability to function and their well-being.

When you understand trauma as well as how it can affect you, your mental health, and your relationships, it’s a great first step to putting measures in place to begin healing. There are different types of trauma and traumatic events, and they affect individuals in varied and deeply personal ways.

Types of Trauma and Traumatic Events

Trauma and traumatic events come in different guises. Trauma can be the result of complex life experiences, but it can also be the result of a single event or experiences of ongoing abuse. When a person faces traumatic events and becomes traumatized by them, they can respond in a variety of ways.

They may respond with resilience in the face of such challenges, walking gradually toward recovery. They may also be distressed and require professional support for their well-being.

There are several ways to categorize trauma. One common way to do this is by addressing the nature and the duration of exposure to the traumatic event. The main types of trauma that arise from different kinds of life-threatening or distressing experiences are acute, chronic, and complex trauma.

Acute trauma stems from a sudden, single event that’s highly distressing. This sort of event disrupts a person’s sense of safety, upending how secure they feel in everyday life. Acute trauma can be caused by events like witnessing a violent crime, the unexpected death of a loved one, being subjected to sexual or physical assault, getting caught up in a natural disaster like wildfire, or undergoing a life-threatening illness or serious injury.

The second kind of trauma, chronic trauma, is the sort that arises when one is repeatedly exposed to the trauma over a long period of time. That period could be months or years, and it includes experiences like persistent harassment or bullying, facing chronic illness or an ongoing medical issue, long-term emotional, sexual, or physical abuse, or living in a violent neighborhood or in a warzone.

Complex trauma is a third kind of trauma, and it is often quite severe. It can be the result of varied, multiple, and prolonged traumatic events. These events will often carry a sense of being trapped and feeling unable to escape the situation. Situations such as childhood abuse, prolonged exposure to domestic abuse, being trafficked, or experiencing torture or refugee trauma are examples of complex trauma.

Other forms of trauma would include what’s known as intergenerational trauma, which references trauma responses being transmitted across generations. People who’ve been exposed to trauma such as war, colonization, or systemic racism may pass on their trauma responses to their descendants.

Another form of trauma is secondary or vicarious trauma. This form of trauma typically affects individuals in the helping professions who are repeatedly exposed to other people’s suffering and trauma. This would include social workers, medical personnel, first responders, and others who witness and are exposed to others’ traumatic experiences.

Trauma may also be named depending on when it occurs. There is a category of trauma which is called adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). These potentially traumatic experiences that a child undergoes have a lasting impact well into adulthood. They include experiences like neglect, abuse, and parental abandonment.

How Trauma Affects Your Mental Health and Relationships

Depending on the context, duration, and intensity of the traumatic experience a person undergoes, the impact will vary. The impact of traumatic events will also depend on other factors, such as one’s personality and the support system they have around themselves. Trauma affects you mentally, emotionally, and physically. Not only that, but trauma also affects daily life as well as your relationships with other people.

One of the main ways that trauma affects a person is by disrupting their sense of safety, self-worth, and trust. Mentally and emotionally, trauma creates challenges such as emotional dysregulation. This is when a person is unable to handle their own emotions, including soothing themselves. Trauma can result in anger, shame, sadness, and even intense fear, but it can also result in emotional numbness and feeling disconnected.

Trauma can also have these effects:

Withdrawal and avoidance To avoid reminders of the trauma, a traumatized person may steer clear of people, places, situations, or even sounds and smells that trigger trauma and have associations with the trauma. Many survivors step back from hobbies and communal activities. Avoidance and withdrawal often result in difficulties maintaining relationships and one’s social support system.

Changes in self-perception When a person is traumatized, it can change how they perceive themselves as well as the world they inhabit. Imagine what it’s like to be caught up in a natural disaster. What may have felt familiar and reliable starts to feel unsafe or unstable. If it’s relational trauma, feelings such as guilt, self-blame, and mistrust of others may set in.

Intrusive memories and thoughts One sign of trauma and how it’s affecting a person is when they experience flashbacks, distressing memories of the event, or nightmares. These memories and thoughts make them relive the traumatic event over and over. This can be quite disturbing and deeply unsettling for one’s focus and emotional stability.

Hyperarousal Trauma can lead to one’s body responding as though it is under constant threat. This makes it hard to rest, and you’re easily startled. Hyperarousal makes a person feel constantly on edge and unable to settle.

Health problems Putting your body under constant stress will affect your body and lead to health problems. When trauma isn’t resolved, it increases the risk of health conditions such as hypertension, diabetes, and heart disease. Trauma can show up as unexplained ailments such as fatigue, chronic pain, headaches, and gastrointestinal concerns.

Relational difficulties The trust issues trauma nurtures can result in a fear of intimacy, as well as finding it hard to form and maintain relationships with other people. Someone who has experienced trauma will often find it hard to express their emotional needs. They may withdraw during conflict or misinterpret their partner’s actions as threatening.

Relationships may become strained because of trauma. One’s partner may feel rejected, overwhelmed, and confused. That might lead to even greater distance in the relationship. Even one’s parenting can be affected. A traumatized parent may become detached from their child or overprotective. They may also struggle to manage their child’s emotional needs.

Work strain Just as trauma can affect personal relationships, it can also affect how a person functions in professional settings, whether at work or school. Decision-making and sustaining focus become harder due to trauma; even maintaining regular routines or socializing can become overwhelming. Trauma can impact how you interact with other people, and that includes at work.

A trauma survivor can become anxious in team environments; they may be overly cautious or even highly sensitive to criticism from authority figures. Issues such as emotional outbursts, missed deadlines, absenteeism, and difficulty collaborating with others can all make for a challenging professional life. Isolation may be the result, as well as limited opportunities for advancement.

Unhealthy coping mechanisms The overwhelming emotions unleashed by a traumatic experience can be hard to process and handle in a healthy way. For some survivors, alcohol, drugs, risky behaviors like unsafe driving or casual liaisons, or self-harm become ways to cope. These, however, aren’t healthy ways to cope. They complicate healing from trauma, and they can cause significant damage.

Finding Help to Overcome Trauma

It’s possible to recover from trauma with time. However, for some, their symptoms persist or even worsen, and that’s a good indicator that you need to seek professional help. Trauma counselors or therapists can walk with you using evidence-based treatments and therapies. In some instances, prescribed medication may be necessary to tamp down the impact of the symptoms of trauma.

With the help of a trauma counselor or therapist, you can rebuild your sense of safety, stability, and the healthy relationships that help you stay connected and that nurture well-being. Talk to someone immediately if you’re distressed and have thoughts of self-harm. Help is available through a crisis line or by calling emergency services.

Consider working with a counselor to find hope and healing from your trauma. Connect with this office to set up an initial consultation.